My Nana gave me jelly beans
And so of course I went and ate ‘em
I don’t know how to tell her this
But – oh, my gosh, I hate ‘em!
I wouldn’t say that they were bad
I’d say that they were worse than awful:
They’re gruesome, noisome, smelly beans
And ought to be unlawful.
One tastes like bile; one tastes like grout;
And one’s like liver mixed with trout.
But while my Nana’s watching me
I daren’t spit ‘em out.
Some taste like toadstools on my tongue
Some taste like vipers might have viped ‘em
Some may have come from Baby’s diaper
After Baby diaped ‘em.
I wish I had a time machine
So I could tell her not to buy ‘em
… And those are all the reasons why
I will not let you try ‘em.








